Title: The Journey to Peace: How a Prayer and a New Love Taught Me to Trust Again
I used to believe love was meant to feel like a storm. My last relationship was full of chaos and loneliness. He pushed me away, communication dwindled, and I felt more alone than ever—even when we were together. He was a master of indirect abandonment, leaving for long periods and never reaching out first.
The breaking point wasn't a big fight; it was a heavy feeling in my heart. The thought of ikhtilat (unnecessary mixing with the opposite gender) made me realize I needed to step back and take care of myself—for my own sake and for Allah's.
Today, I’m in a new relationship, and the contrast is profound. My partner is kind and consistent, and our relationship is filled with a sense of peace. But after living in chaos for so long, this peace felt strange, even unsettling. I've heard the phrase that "peace can feel strange after a storm," and I found myself self-sabotaging—pushing away the very thing I'd prayed for.
I'm learning to catch myself in those moments and remind myself that this new peace is a blessing from Allah, not a threat.
Healing from the Scars
My old wounds haven't disappeared. The scars from my past still affect me, and I'm slowly learning to acknowledge them. This is the first step to healing. By realizing what he did has affected me, I can focus on what truly needs healing. With my current partner, I'm learning to be vulnerable—to gently share my insecurities instead of keeping them inside. His acceptance in those moments has taught me that I am safe with him.
Learning to trust him is the hardest part. The doubts creep in, and the fear of being abandoned again can be overwhelming. But I'm learning that trust is a process, built slowly through small, consistent actions—not on grand gestures.
My Roadmap to Trust and Peace
Here are the practices that have helped me heal and open my heart to this new kind of love:
Acknowledge the past, but don't let it define your present. My current partner is not the one who hurt me. I remind myself of this every day.
Communicate openly. Sharing my insecurities has allowed him to understand me better.
Notice his consistency. I'm learning to pay attention to the small, steady things he does—listening, showing up, and caring in simple ways. These are the bricks that build trust.
Shift to gratitude. I often make a list of the things I love about him. This simple act helps my heart lean toward love and away from fear.
Make dua. Ultimately, true trust comes from putting my faith in Allah first. I ask Him to heal my heart and fill our relationship with sakinah (tranquility).
"Ya Allah, heal my heart from old wounds. Grant me strength to trust, patience to love, and wisdom to see the goodness You’ve placed in my partner. Fill our relationship with peace, mercy, and barakah.”
Healing isn’t about erasing the scars; it’s about learning to live with them while opening your heart to love again. I remind myself daily that peace is a blessing from Allah, and it is worth protecting.
May Allah grant us strength to heal, wisdom to see the good in the people we love, and patience to nurture the relationships that bring us closer to Him. Aamiin. 🤍
Share Your Thoughts Below
Have you ever experienced a similar journey from chaos to peace? What has helped you heal and build trust again? I'd love to hear your story.
